I have been a little more vocal about my journey to parenthood lately. At the time I am writting this, it has been 2.5 years of waiting to hold a baby in my arms. I wrote this blog post about it at the beginning of our journey – sadly not knowing I would still be here today. If you’re on a similar path, you know just how much it sucks to see your period come and go month after month. That is why I got Kät Taniberg to write something about embracing your menstruation when trying to conceive.
*Note that the following post was not written by me and contains gendered language.
TTC = Trying to conceive
How to embrace the arrival of your monthly bleed whilst trying to conceive
Picture this: You and your partner are TTC, your period is already a couple of days late and you are getting ecstatic, you’ve done it – you’re pregnant! Only to wake up the next morning to the arrival of your menstrual bleed… The feelings of defeat, of sadness, of mourning are taking over…
Even though I have never been there myself I have chatted to several women that have been in this exact position and there is a common theme of feeling like you “hate” your period, like it’s the bearer of bad news. And I get it, I would feel the same way if I was in your shoes… But what if we could turn your feeling of defeat and loss into feelings of acceptance? What if we could turn to your inner Wise Woman and connect to her wisdom.
Join me as I unpack this topic. My name is Kät and I am a menstrual cycle coach. I empower women to live life in sync with their natural cycle, to become besties with their inner seasons. This work has changed my life and I am on a mission to spread the awareness of our super power that lies in our cyclical nature as menstruators. I do however fully understand that there are times in our life when we feel like the arrival of our cycle can be the worst thing that has happened to us (ex: the above scenario). Today I invite you to join me as we try to find the silver lining in all of this.
Understanding the power of your menstrual phase
Did you know that your menstrual phase is also known as the “Call of your inner Wise Woman”? During this phase we are deeply connected to our own intuition, as well as the intuition of the world. Have you ever heard of the concept of “The Red Tent”? “The concept of a Red Tent is rooted in ancient history. The Red Tent was a sacred place where women went during their menstrual cycles and during the process of giving birth. It was a place where women could feel safe, and could honour and celebrate their femininity and sisterhood.” Yet we seem to be so connected from this ancient tradition and instead look at our period as a nuisance. What if instead of fighting our biology we chose to make friends with it and took time each month to connect to our inner intuition? We would be able to become so much more wise and rooted in our own truth.
Welcome your feelings about it
Let’s come back to the scenario that I started this blog post with. How can you look at the arrival of your period as a gift instead of loss? What if we could turn to that inner Wise Woman and ask her for guidance on how to navigate this situation? But first – allow yourself to feel whatever you need to feel – break down on the bathroom floor, cry your eyes out, call your partner, call your friend – do whatever YOU need to do to release the physical emotions and lift some of that heavy burden you are feeling. Maybe even have a sad dance party (emotions are energy in motion and if we move physiologically we are able to move our emotions too).
Ask for guidance
After you have allowed yourself to feel whatever you need to feel I invite you to grab your journal and sit down in meditation (here is my favourite meditations for my menstrual bleed from the free app Insight Timer). Before you start your meditation I invite you to grab your journal and write down the question that you need guidance with. “Why am I not able to conceive?” “What is missing?” “How can I change the position I am in?” or whatever your question might be. Set the journal aside and get started with your meditation.
As you start the meditation I encourage you to invite in your inner Wise Woman,. Invite her in and ask her to share her wisdom with you. Sit in meditation for however long you need to and watch for the signs that might come up for you. They could be words, they could be symbols, they could be memories, it all depends on your own personal journey. Once you feel like you are ready to come out of your meditation I invite you to grab your journal and start free writing at least 3 pages worth. Whilst you do this watch the magic unfold on the paper in front of you, just let the pen flow. If you are experiencing a block and the words aren’t flowing, give yourself time and keep an open mind. If you’re new to journaling this might seem foreign, but I invite you to TRUST & SURRENDER.
Trust and Surrender
Trust & Surrender are one of the most feminine traits that we can embody and it’s in the moments of breaking down that we need to practice trust & surrender the most, because the truth is that nothing happens to us, it all happen for us, but it’s up to us to have an open mind to receive the messages we need to receive.
I believe in you and in your journey. I believe in your Inner Wise Woman and I invite you to believe in yourself & her as well. You are worthy, you are loved, you are held.
Head over to Kät’s Instagram to connect with her on all things menstrual cycle and to see her most current offerings